Out of My Mind

Mummy’s time of the month meant that I wasn’t able to join her as she enjoyed the water at Wild Wild Wet(sorry people who messaged me to meet, was busy on Saturday and Sunday with the little one).

But it was a sweet weekend, when she ventured to the East on both days.

Terminal 3 on Saturday night after dinner, where she terrorised little kids at T3 with her hugs. She ran after a boy who just turned two, and then she hugged him! The boy was taken aback initially but he later took on the flirting game intrepidly. That’s my girl!

The little boy then waved bye to her, and then gestured her to sleep well, before they parted with flying kisses.

They just melt our hearts lah!

She couldn’t keep still at T3, and she attempted to climb onto the luggage belt at the check in counter, before I reminded her that she is still under 2 and can travel for free, and there isn’t any reason for her to travel illegally by cargo.

Bought toys for her at T3, before she fell asleep on the journey back west.

The next day, brought her to Wild Wild Wet for a baby birthday party!

This time she was so shy when a younger boy came over to hug her that she kept hiding behind my legs and pulling my jeans. Do children have this in them? The pull-mummy’s-pants-and-hide-behind-her-cos-I-shy routine?

She was incredibly manja that it was so funny to watch.

And when she went to Wild Wild wet, she resented wearing the little lifevest, but after a while, she was strutting it around like a little penguin.

My little penguin ran and ran in the water and couldn’t stop laughing. Eventually when we unbuckled the first buckle to her life vest, she broke into an immediate loud sob!

It was so nice seeing her enjoying her afternoon, before she got so bushed that she just had a long nap while we had dinner and watched the first sets of the Women’s Team match.

Then ah, she woke up and just had to tell me she needed to do her big business, and I had to egg her on as she pushed on her potty. A nice shower in the evening later, she was smelling all fresh and nice.

It was a nice weekend. So sweet.

And she’s a lady now, isn’t she?

I know very late, but still, I think the girls put up a great fight. Of course, Phelps was amazing as well on Sunday.

And besides Olympic, and having my days filled with the little one, my life is pretty much filled with nothing.

Of course, there were the brilliant mahjong sessions over last Thursday and Friday, which saw my mum happily taking over my seat, and annoyed the hell out of other players.

And how she would be telling others I am a liar, when I answered her honestly when she asked some irrelevant questions about baby. Which is strange, cos for the questions she asked, there were no reasons why I should lie. My baby leh, lie for what?! Then, it was evident why I don’t ever bother talking to her, nor answer her questions. Cos there simply is no point.

Tell truth you say this, tell you something, you assume the worst of things, talk so much to you whatever fuck for?

But it kept her happy whilst she nagged and said stupid things due to her own pettiness, and it is good to keep her happy. I think when she puts away her ignorance, she could be lovely.

It is simply sad today when Dad drove me to work, and he sighed as he said, “It is very sad for her one you know, next time, she will be such a lonely person cos she is so hard to get along.”

I know exactly what he is talking about. She is often so negative about things that when I try to break the ice and share things with her, she puts me down and slams me immediately. There is a point that it could get tiring to try.

Last Thursday we had 2 mahjong tables, and it was buzzing at home. It felt good. At least there was some company for her as well.

Anyway.

It hasn’t been easy days for me these days. My heart feels unusually heavy with the departure of one colleague. Not someone extremely close to me, but somehow, the usual emotional me can’t help but feel a stir.

When I set out to join my present company, I have a plan to stay here and outlast longer than many thought I would. And thereafter, the wonderful gang here made me feel comfortable enough to slip into the comfort zone I so sought after.

And when the balance is disrupted, it just gets morale low.

Maybe that’s why, the posts here are getting few.

!!!!!!!!!

I spent the past few hours going to the mini-television in the office, and back to my cubicle, and then to another meeting, and yet with my heart firmly glued to the television.

I saw many people come and go from the front of the television, some of them filled with negativity, some of them simply nonchalant, some of them, like me, were brimmed to the max with adrenalin.

I joked about how if I was at the stadium, I would have been red-carded as well(I think some of them were red-carded… for some reasons I know not what, since our television was muted, and the only grunts and ooohs were heard, were from us).

We ended with rounds of cheers and claps when Feng Tianwei sealed the fate of the Singapore Women’s Team for table tennis, and they are in to the finals.

It was so exciting can?

And when Feng Tianwei came on the 2nd time for the final set, all the females in my office went, “Wow…. so cute! So suave! So handsome!”

“Wah looks like a Korean heart throb leh! Maybe that’s why the South Korean chick cannot concentrate!!!”

Coos. Coos. Coos. Coos.

We were shouting from everything from, “ONE MILLION!!!!”

“PUBLIC HOLIDAY!!!!!!”

“YOU MY NEW PIN UP!!”

“SO COOL!”

SWOON SWOON SWOON SWOON.

Now May suggest I can print her pictures into 30 x A3 posters and stick on everyone’s office table.

And the other player, Wang Yue Gu, was called auntie by some of our colleagues, before we realised she is like, less than a year older than us. Her efforts were really commendable when she came back from behind.

And though many slammed Li Jiawei for not performing up to expectations, I do think she did contribute to the doubles’ victory. And for those who think she cannot hold herself together during pressure, for the numbers of big events she had taken part in, I really wonder how she did it.

And of course, most people think “Singapore sure get silver now one lah!”.

But don’t forget, never underestimate the underdogs. And with my Moscow experience, I repeated this just now once too many times, and I will repeat this again, “There can be miracles, when you believe….”

(Tidbits: Feng Tianwei actually beat world number 1 Zhang Yining before! And she was world’s 73rd when she came to Singapore last year, and she now is 12th. Auntie Wang is 8th, and Li Jiawei is 6th)

And gee, I didn’t even realise Singapore’s coach is actually the older brother of China’s coach!

A day after I saw the little green creature, I was bringing Minibean 0ut when I saw this green mess right next to the lift.

I think its ambiguous identity got on the nerves of some people out there, and in their frustration, they destroyed it.

Strangely, I saw it’s thin wings amidst its carcass, just like those cockroach wings -shudders at thought- and I was still clueless what creature it is. Poor thing, dismembered just like that. And it happened at my floor. The murderer is among us.

While I was sick and lonely at home, my dear colleagues decided to tempt me just before I was due to return to work - supper at Newton on Sunday night, when my fever was still lurking.

Daniel picked me up from my place near midnight, and we met up with Stephanie.

I was having fever, but I was sick and tired of all the food I was missing out.

It was nice meeting up with my colleagues again after not seeing them for so long. Yay.

But I got home feeling sicker and didn’t feel too well. Bah.

My first day back at work after the long absence was heading to Fairmont hotel for a shoot.

Nice view from 25th floor.

Me trying on the model’s wardrobe.

So nice okay!

And Shiseido’s new range of Maquillage make up, with superbly nice eye colours to go with. They kindly sponsored the looks for this shoot, so we had an exclusive preview of them before they hit the market.

Was tired by the end of the day and headed home straight to rest.

Wednesday morning was yet another meeting, and it was at Royal Copenhagen at Takashimaya.

A place I have been wanting to go to, but have never been.

Had breakfast there, and met up with Harper’s Bazaar’s Valerie.

If only all my mornings start like that…

Concluded the day with plenty of laughs and imagination at House with 3 other colleagues after we decided we needed to chill after a long, tiring, excruciating day at work.

Daniel’s desserts. With his artistic creation.
Stephanies’s.
Mine.
May’s!

It was a nice place, where we spun a story of the ancient pugilistic world, which was continued during today’s lunch at Long John Silver.

And.. last but not least….

My little surprise get-well gift which I received on Saturday!

It fits nicely into my Eva Clutch when I do not want to brim it with my wallet.

Love it to bits!

Starting to cough again. Not a good sign. Nah uh.

The special edition books are here!

Very heavy though, so unless arrangement for collections are made, I can only manage 5 copies at a time.

I decided to get one too, and I reserve one for potato and my wifey already!

Yaay.

No. Really. I am in Singapore.

And now at 12.19am, as I am chatting to 2 colleagues, and psyching myself up to go to work tomorrow……

………. my fever is back to 38.1.

And today, I managed to drag myself into the hot sun for something really unexpected(already arranged too long ago, cannot postpone, so I dragged my sorry ass out).

I did the wrong thing of heading for dinner thereafter, thinking I can function like a proper human being.

I felt sick and headed for home before I could catch up with rest of the girlies.

NOW?! After watching the replay of team USA men winning the relay, I think the heat got to me.

And last Friday, my boss apparently asked 2 of my colleagues if I was overseas for a holiday instead.

I can only think that he suspects I am in Beijing all these while, since my previous trip to CL finals was a stunt too many find hard to forget.

I am cold. No. I am hot. No. I am just having my brains fried.

I think the main reason to my grouchiness these days, besides the fact that my brains are fried, is that I am losing faith.

I used to be so hopeful. Hopeful of people, hopeful of friends, hopeful of relationships, hopeful of the good of people.

I stopped being so.

Someday, I wish the hope will come back to me. Yet I am wary that all the disappointments being hopeful might bring.

***

I can’t believe it.

I am still having a fever, and I still can’t to sleep well.

My doctor prescribed me with 3 days of Ponstan, and it is now day 3.

Don’t tell me I have to see a doctor again for the 3rd time in less than a week.

ROARRRR~

Now, I have to pick Minibean up. I didn’t expect that I am still this unwell.

I had a shower and I was shivering throughout, even though the sun was blazing so brightly just now(not sure about now, but I can hear thunder).

I feel weaker today than yesterday and I feel my muscles and tight and aching.

I am whining about this fever so much that I can’t even stand myself anymore.

Have a great weekend peeps!

After watching the magnificent display of Beijing Olympics’ opening(I certainly wasn’t expecting that much! But Chinese being Chinese being the ones who care about “face value” the most… I shouldn’t be THAT surprised), I am seriously awed.

I should know. I am a Chinese, not a Chinese chinese but still a Chinese, so I know how the “cannot lose” mentality works.

And I would love to see how the English top it off at the next game (wah lau, things there so expensive, and if they import also lagi expensive!).

If you have been to China’s trade shows, you will know that they are well capable of coming up of such productions, there is a reason why so many of our stuff are produced in China.

Economical, good, and innovative.

Besides the dazzling display…

My favourite part was the part where I learnt to pronounce all the participating countries’ names(of course the one announce by the commentator and not the live hosts at the stadium), and thinking to myself how I never knew some of these countries exist. And then you realise, this is about sportsmanship, and it doesn’t matter how sensitive some of their backgrounds might be.

I was silently pleased with myself when I trying to gauge when the teams I wanna see are coming out.

As the countries are lined up based on the number of strokes to the Chinese characters, I was glad my “predictions” came pretty accurate - meaning I still remember how to count the strokes to the characters, as well as knowing the characters to these countries well.

So my toilet breaks were nicely timed.

I enjoyed seeing people of different race coming together, and seeing the excitement of the countries who took part in the games for the very first time, and then knowing how some of the countries are too poor and had never won a medal, but still relentlessly take part in every game, because honour to them, is not to have the most splendid ra-ra opening or the most number of medals, BUT completing the competition itself for their countries.

And now…

After watching the opening, how will National Day Parade match up tomorrow?

Of course cannot compare, I know.

Anyway, I am in bed for the 3rd day in a roll. After taking my Ponstans, my fever still hovers at 38 for the whole of today.

Okay, but at least it is 37.9 now. And cos I already took 2 Ponstans at the prescribed timing, I seriously don’t want to OD myself.

So I am just gonna accept the fact that I am just HOT. Like, seriously, very HOT.

I finally took a bite this dinner, and it’s my only meal for the past 2 days.

And after putting on weight, I am half glad seeing 49 on the scales.

But I am not glad how I am still bed-bound.

And today, I am too much of a chicken to shower. Again.

I am still running a fever.

That is, even after 2 x 2 doses of Ponstan.

I went back to the same doctor today, after my fever finally subsided a little, and the weather was good enough for me not to faint outdoors.

I haven’t eaten anything today yet though it is no longer today as it is nearing 12.30am.

I was given two days MC, meaning I might give tomorrow workday a miss if I am still feeling too groggy. I was jokingly saying that my long MC stint is gonna get me sacked.

The doctor gave me an additional 20 pills for my nose(10 days dosage), on top of the 6 I complained of(maybe he psychic, knows what I wrote in my blog) in my blog, after seeing the state I was in when I staggered into his room.

I now have 2 bottles of cough syrup. tons of lozenges. And many runny nose tablets to KO me.

I spoke to my baby today and she roars like a lion. So cute and it cheered my day up. I feel as if I am quarantined, you know?

Mum specifically instructed over her nagging session that I shouldn’t be anywhere near her.

But! I finally showered after 2 days of no bathing. Hehehehe.

My lips chapped too much from dehydration. I scared doctor want to drip me.

So what could get worse from yesterday after my visit to the clinic? Or rather, after my previous post?

I went to take a nap, and when I woke up, the sore throat is miraculously gone(or rather, my throat is all numb from the lozenges, but I can feel the throat is swollen).

But my nose was caked with dried goo.

My sore throat made me drool all over the pillow and bed.

And then, I was shivering and feeling extremely unwell.

How suey you tell me? After my trip to the doctor’s, I got fever. And my sniff sniff goo became green, and thick, and I was breathing like those perverts over the phone. And! I started coughing badly.

I felt warm, I was delirious, and I couldn’t find fever medication.

So, for the whole of yesterday, I saw the temperature shot up to almost 39, and then back to 38.5 and there about.

I couldn’t sleep even though I took 2 medications that were supposed to make me drowsy.

I was threatened with a cold bath, and I refused to go through that agony. I settled for the ice pack instead.

I woke up every hour in the night, to either wrap tissue dumplings, or to check my temperature cos I could feel the heat from my duvet.

It has been 18 hours since my fever, and I am still having a fever at 38.3, as of now. And I think my body has grown used to the heat, and besides being a little shiverish and feeling weak, I thought I was good enough to head back to work.

I don’t remember the last time I had such an uncomfy fever, cos normally, they go away as fast as they came.

This one, I tell you, made me so delirious that I was mumbling gibberish at one point last night.

And because it happened after my trip to the doctor, I will need to head back to get another day of MC off. Grr….

And yesterday he only gave me lozenges, 6 tablets for runny nose(for 3 days), and antibiotics.

I had to self medicate last night digging all the medication from wherever. Everything but fever medication, cos I seldom get high fever.

And I ran out of aspirin. My dad’s paracetamol looked extremely tempting, but I don’t want to tempt fate(I am allergic to it).

And I still couldn’t sleep.

But at least, I can talk now.

Bah.