Congratulations to Cat and Ben!

A beautiful baby girl was borned to this blissful couple today….

Yet another of my friend enters motherhood. Gee.

What a productive year it has been eh?

And… my deadlines are finally met and over.. for this month.

And.. I did the house chores despite the bodyaches today. It is pretty funny to see my new weekend cleaner was breaking the vase, tearing my dad’s handkerchieves(from scrubbing too hard when washing them)…..

But she’s a nice lady with 2 teenage girls. I even thought of learning Spanish massage from her. Maybe I can try it on Spanish men one day(cough cough) and ask them if the massage is authentic enough.

Though I still feel irked by the fact with how my mum has been calling me EVERYDAY to ask me stupid things about the new help, simply because of her own paranoia.

When I answer her honestly with the last bit of patience in me, she would repeat ‘You sure you not lying to me? You so close to your dad, I am sure he tells you… I don’t believe what you said. I don’t believe you don’t know anything.’

Damn freaking irritating.

If you don’t believe even I said the truthful answers for the 10th time, don’t freaking ask me again. Just get off the phone.

Anyway. That aside.

I can’t stop giggling looking at this series of pictures that I will smother you guys with over the weekend.

Muahaha.

Enjoy your long weekend people.

I shall go lie down in bed more.

It has been a while since I was last reminded what is important.

Today, after a slightly depressing chat with a friend, I ended up tearing in the midst of a meeting, and feeling a total mess.

I felt kinda helpless, and decided to reach for the Daily Bread Bernice passed me one day in the office, after the cab driver had urged her to take a few to distribute.

She had taken one for me, that sweetie.

I have no idea why I was randomly searching for something, perhaps from the stress from work(deadlines these few days, you see, and I needed some stuff which I couldn’t seem to get the people holding them), perhaps from my cranky mood.

I remember a friend once flared up at me because I wasn’t supportive of her back then for a relationship that was set to doom, and because I found the guy’s behaviour a tad too… erratic, enough to call for a red alert.

Eventually, the second time I had my worries, I decided to let go, and just be there, like she had expected me to be. I had wanted to tell her not to throw caution into the wind, because not all guy friends are there as friends, because they are truly friends.

I am not sure if it is a case double standards these days, but nonetheless, it was a rather hurting experience.

I realised, I have no one to account to these days, and you guys may or may not understand why in the hell I do some stuff, and that it might just be my stupidity setting into motion, however I deny that, no one would be convinced, anyhow.

I do not believe in I-told-you-so’s, cos those are the most stupidest and most unconstructive things anyone could ever say.

Just as I was in pretty much tangled in a web of stress, I opted for what I would had opted in the past, but seldom do these days.

And I am quite glad to see something I had always came across in the past, that has such familiarity, yet had slipped away…

‘We walk by faith, not by sight’ 2 Corinthians 5:7

And as I read on, I felt more peace.

Unopened Tomorrows

We often wish we could see what lies around the corner in life. Then we could prepare for it, control it, or avoid it.

A wise person has said, ” Though we can’t see around corners, God can.” How much better and more reassuring that is!

Recently my 10 year-old grand daughter Emily and I were boiling eggs for breakfast. As we stared into the boiling water and wondered how long it would take to get the eggs just right, Emily said, ” Pity we can’t open them up to see how they’re doing.” I agreed. But that would have spoiled them, so we had to rely on guesswork, with no guarantee of results.

We began talking about other things we would like to see but can’t - like tomorrow. Too bad we can’t crack tomorrow open, we said, to see if it’s the way we would like it. But meddling with tomorrow before its time, like opening a partly cooked egg, would spoil both today and tomorrow.

Because Jesus has promised to care for us every day - and that includes tomorrow - we can live by faith one day at a time.

Emily and I decided to leave tomorrow safely in God’s hands. Have you?

Though I know not what awaits me,
What the future has in store,
Yet I know the Lord is faithful,
For I’ve proved Him oft before.

And as I embroiled in another chat with a friend, I was puzzled, and questioned my queries.

And I am thankful, to her, for what she had spoken.

I then read on, to today’s Bible Reading.

Matthew 6:25-34

Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on(uhmm.. note: weight?). Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?

Ah well.

I must be really, really maxed out by work.

Today and yesterday weren’t that great.

Had lunch with the usual gang from work.

Got ourselves locked in the office rushing the deadlines in the midst of the thunderstorms out there(Sighsy, I should be home sleeping).

Got myself tired entertaining phone calls from my mum(she has to call me two consecutive days to ask me stupid questions about the new part-time cleaner to make sure she is not my dad’s new girlfriend. I responded by giving her I-don’t-know’s and she is adamant I am covering something up by saying I-don’t-know. Mum, I just don’t want to answer stupid questions that insult my intelligence).

I had met up with Nick after work yesterday before the 2 of us took the train to meet Kelvin at Braddell, and Nick left to get his bike fixed.

We picked Vamp up thereafter, before heading down to Pacific Plaza to meet up with Chrissy and her friend.

Brian joined us. Max and Bibi joined us. Nick joined us.

We adjourned to Lido’s Mac, where Boonboon joined us.

My migraine got worse and I left for home before midnight, and crawled right into bed right after I gave my hair a nice shampoo after getting slightly damp from the rain.

Thanks guys for helping with the interview. I just need my voice file now so I can do my transcript…..

My weekend was relatively bland.

I don’t know what I can say of it besides I slept half my Friday(after our important meeting which we stayed up most of the night of, we had half day off! Yay!) until 9pm, most of my Saturday, and almost all of my Sunday away.

I would wake up around 1ish after sleeping at 3ish or 4ish, crawl back into bed by 2 or 3pm, and only greet the day by 7 in the evening.

I didn’t go anywhere. I hope that save me some moolah.

I met up with Raf on Friday after the dreaded morning meeting, and she joined me and several of my colleagues for lunch before we did some girlie catch up over coffee.

Alas, I was so zoned out that I was the worst possible company.

Ah well.

Now, it is time for me to head back to work(I am terribly fearful of facing the monitor on weekends these days, you know), and rush the deadline.

And Vamp and Nick, if you guys are still not up, I will be so dead.

It has been a while since I was last reminded what is important.

Today, after a slightly depressing chat with a friend, I ended up tearing in the midst of a meeting, and feeling a total mess.

I felt kinda helpless, and decided to reach for the Daily Bread Bernice passed me one day in the office, after the cab driver had urged her to take a few to distribute.

She had taken one for me, that sweetie.

I have no idea why I was randomly searching for something, perhaps from the stress from work(deadlines these few days, you see, and I needed some stuff which I couldn’t seem to get the people holding them), perhaps from my cranky mood.

I remember a friend once flared up at me because I wasn’t supportive of her back then for a relationship that was set to doom, and because I found the guy’s behaviour a tad too… erratic, enough to call for a red alert.

Eventually, the second time I had my worries, I decided to let go, and just be there, like she had expected me to be. I had wanted to tell her not to throw caution into the wind, because not all guy friends are there as friends, because they are truly friends.

I am not sure if it is a case double standards these days, but nonetheless, it was a rather hurting experience.

I realised, I have no one to account to these days, and you guys may or may not understand why in the hell I do some stuff, and that it might just be my stupidity setting into motion, however I deny that, no one would be convinced, anyhow.

I do not believe in I-told-you-so’s, cos those are the most stupidest and most unconstructive things anyone could ever say.

Just as I was in pretty much tangled in a web of stress, I opted for what I would had opted in the past, but seldom do these days.

And I am quite glad to see something I had always came across in the past, that has such familiarity, yet had slipped away…

‘We walk by faith, not by sight’ 2 Corinthians 5:7

And as I read on, I felt more peace.

Unopened Tomorrows

We often wish we could see what lies around the corner in life. Then we could prepare for it, control it, or avoid it.

A wise person has said, ” Though we can’t see around corners, God can.” How much better and more reassuring that is!

Recently my 10 year-old grand daughter Emily and I were boiling eggs for breakfast. As we stared into the boiling water and wondered how long it would take to get the eggs just right, Emily said, ” Pity we can’t open them up to see how they’re doing.” I agreed. But that would have spoiled them, so we had to rely on guesswork, with no guarantee of results.

We began talking about other things we would like to see but can’t - like tomorrow. Too bad we can’t crack tomorrow open, we said, to see if it’s the way we would like it. But meddling with tomorrow before its time, like opening a partly cooked egg, would spoil both today and tomorrow.

Because Jesus has promised to care for us every day - and that includes tomorrow - we can live by faith one day at a time.

Emily and I decided to leave tomorrow safely in God’s hands. Have you?

Though I know not what awaits me,
What the future has in store,
Yet I know the Lord is faithful,
For I’ve proved Him oft before.

And as I embroiled in another chat with a friend, I was puzzled, and questioned my queries.

And I am thankful, to her, for what she had spoken.

I then read on, to today’s Bible Reading.

Matthew 6:25-34

Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on(uhmm.. note: weight?). Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?

Ah well.

I must be really, really maxed out by work.

Today and yesterday weren’t that great.

Had lunch with the usual gang from work.

Got ourselves locked in the office rushing the deadlines in the midst of the thunderstorms out there(Sighsy, I should be home sleeping).

Got myself tired entertaining phone calls from my mum(she has to call me two consecutive days to ask me stupid questions about the new part-time cleaner to make sure she is not my dad’s new girlfriend. I responded by giving her I-don’t-know’s and she is adamant I am covering something up by saying I-don’t-know. Mum, I just don’t want to answer stupid questions that insult my intelligence).

I had met up with Nick after work yesterday before the 2 of us took the train to meet Kelvin at Braddell, and Nick left to get his bike fixed.

We picked Vamp up thereafter, before heading down to Pacific Plaza to meet up with Chrissy and her friend.

Brian joined us. Max and Bibi joined us. Nick joined us.

We adjourned to Lido’s Mac, where Boonboon joined us.

My migraine got worse and I left for home before midnight, and crawled right into bed right after I gave my hair a nice shampoo after getting slightly damp from the rain.

Thanks guys for helping with the interview. I just need my voice file now so I can do my transcript…..

My weekend was relatively bland.

I don’t know what I can say of it besides I slept half my Friday(after our important meeting which we stayed up most of the night of, we had half day off! Yay!) until 9pm, most of my Saturday, and almost all of my Sunday away.

I would wake up around 1ish after sleeping at 3ish or 4ish, crawl back into bed by 2 or 3pm, and only greet the day by 7 in the evening.

I didn’t go anywhere. I hope that save me some moolah.

I met up with Raf on Friday after the dreaded morning meeting, and she joined me and several of my colleagues for lunch before we did some girlie catch up over coffee.

Alas, I was so zoned out that I was the worst possible company.

Ah well.

Now, it is time for me to head back to work(I am terribly fearful of facing the monitor on weekends these days, you know), and rush the deadline.

And Vamp and Nick, if you guys are still not up, I will be so dead.

It is 2 plus, and a few colleagues and I are still up through the night to get things sorted out.

And ironically, it will be one of our earliest days tomorrow when we have to attend a meeting in the East at 8.30am, which means -count of fingers- yours truly have to be awake at 7am.

Being the unwell one, I am naturally the most whiney one of the group.

I even forewarned them that if I do not turn up, I am truly sick.

Which is true, cos I am now feeling the intensity of the torment it has on my body.

I. am. so. groggy.

I went to work today lying across at the back of the cab, alright?

Anyway………..

Muacks sweets! Yes you, SBB.

Did I mention I like the way you cuddle me when it thunders?

I know not why I am actually thinking about that right now, but yeah.

I think I need a cuddle. *Sulks*

Don’t ask me why I am blogging when I am so busy. I took only 2 minutes of break to come up with this.. so it is not skiving, okay?!

Smoke free for 10 days.

I am so proud of myself.

No urge, no cravings, no whatsoever.

Yay.

I even said no when being offered countless sticks for the past 10 days.

So proud of myself.

I am officially off ciggies, for good.

Very unwell.

Work is crazy. Before you can finish one chore, another one would come crashing down on you.

Danny snooped into this website and whined why my blog is prettier and has more pictures than my work’s.

Uhm. Cos the colours are not fixed, and the contents are truly ‘freeplay’, you see. No one to tell me how many words, and no one to tell me how the pictures might be of conflicting nature.

It doesn’t help that I am feeling unwell for the past few days.

I was absent from work after feeling a bit weathered after working on both Saturday and Sunday.

Saturday was for the shoot, which was fun and hilarious, if not for the supervision.

Sunday was back in the office, which I could have just finished those stuff at home.

Working on weekend is unhealthy, I tell you!

I barely survived on Monday morning, and was concussed out cold.

Yet, in my delirium, I rushed back to office in the drizzle to return an outfit that was borrowed.

I returned to work on Tuesday feeling a tad better. Yet I nearly died when I sat to a guy who was smelly.

Work was crazy. I wasn’t allowed to go out to return those gears cos I was needed in the office.

Today, I got into the train feeling absolutely sick.

It was packed, smelly, and I had to stand.

Eventually, I could feel my world slowly fading out….

Buona Vista.

I forced myself out of the train and headed for the nearest bench.

I waited for the next train and it wasn’t as packed, yet there weren’t any seats.

I had to alight at Redhill and take my little rest before I fainted in the train.

I was almost walking right into the stupid wall.

Well, at least I didn’t walk right into the tracks.

Finally, the next train came with some spare seats, and I managed to get to City Hall finally.

My usual train ride was delayed… sigh, and to think I went out of home earlier today.

I got to work at 10.20am.

Ah well.

Had to rush for an appointment at 11am, before I got back at 12noon in the rain.

I pity my colleagues. I end up pinching food off their plates everyday… cos there is nothing that appeals to me at the foodcourt, yet tiny portions of their food(like, the ikan bilis, or the oyster sauce) would tempt me enough to steal food from their plates.

I am beginning to blog like a bot.

Oh well.

Considering the fact that I am writing for print, website, and another 3 blogs(2 of which personal, one of which work-related), I am surprised that I even have the time to be lamenting here.

I hope there will be seats for me in the MRT today after work.

I need my nap. That is, if I don’t end up napping in the hospital or something.

I am darn pissed.

Darn freaking pissed.

So angry.

Fuming.

But I will be okay.

Cos there are many others who touched me greatly and pulled me through today.

Thanks to you guys.

Screw those who screwed up my day.

… Those who visit you despite the pouring rain.

I finally got ample amount of rest today, clocking 10 hours of rest time.

I am never able to stay awake in front of the television long these days, and would doze off even before I would realise it.

An entire week of hectic schedules, with lotsa deadlines to meet, plus the rush for the shoot and such, I am almost… a complete wreckage.

Went to the doctor on Monday before rushing back to town for lunch with Jane Doe, and then it was back to the office, feeling totally drowsy since I didn’t manage to have much quality sleep the day before.

Jane Doe thought I looked like shit.

I thought so too.

SBB called during lunch, and I sounded like shit over the phone too.

Tuesday was yet another mundane day at work, and I was equally lethargic, though I had enough rest to make up for the day before.

Lunched with Bernice, Danny and my game master, and I really must thank God for these fabulous colleagues.

I like it when Bernice is around in the office.

Left the office for location check at the studio.

Went down to the studio but Colin was 2 hours late.

Had dinner with VampTreSS at some coffee shop at Potong Pasir and some odd uncle who cleared our table kept coming back to our table to tell us what we should eat, and we should watch our diet.

Colin then dropped us at Serangoon Gardens where we met up with Nick.

Nick left.

VampTreSS and I adjourned to Chomp Chomp for supper, having the soya bean curd the odd uncle had told us to eat more earlier on.

Cab uncle very nice. I didn’t have enough cash and he gave me a discount.

I got home, tired, and absolutely bushed.

Spoke to SBB before I finally crashed out, leaving my world of worries behind.

Had difficulty waking up.

Had lunch with the bunch of guys from work.

Met up with VampTreSS and Brian to go to army market to get the essential props needed for the shoot.

One shop uncle thought we are preparing for some terrorism act rather than for a shoot for the weapons we are looking for.

VampTreSS and I had dinner at the army market. I love ginger soup with peanut glutinous riceballs. I love spicy food.

Yum.

We went to Suntec. No luck in searching for an AK-47(toy one, I might add).

We chilled for a while before Dad volunteered to pick me up for home.

Thank God. I was just too tired to make my way home and cab fares are just too exorbitant these days.

Woke up on Thursday to a horrid torrent of rain.

I left home a little late for the event at E2Max.

I snuck in and was surprised the guy from the company remembered me from the previous event launch.

I am surprised that some people actually remembered me from the previous launch though it was my first event.

Some remembered me as the photographer, and thought I look professional(muahaha, I am such a bluffer).

In fact, except for one lady whom I had met before who failed to remember me, the rest had managed to recall me from the previous event.

That’s good. That would mean it would be less likely for me to stand around awkwardly by myself in future events, like what I did yesterday at the initial part of the event.

Spoke to a few nice people, made a couple of nice friends in the industry.

Got back to office.

Lunched with Justin, Elaine and Andrei.

Embarrassed them when I scoured a sex shop for a kinky nurse uniform for my shoot.

Back to office.

Endured a few jibes(internal office jokes).

Rushed to the shop to collect the loaned stuff for the shoot. Lugged a few bags around.

Attended meetings.

More meetings.

Left office only at 8.30pm.

Forgot my wallet. Went back to office.

Met Wanyi at 9.30pm. Janise joined us shortly after.

Went to Clarke Quay and decided to chill at Tapas Tree, and saw the darling Joey.

I love you babes, really.

Thanks. You guys know why.

Went to Boat Quay some KTV pub to sing a couple of songs, before it got too tiring for me, and I left in the drizzle at half past 1.

Woke up today and Eileen and Dave brought my god-daughter over.

In the heavy rain, I might add.

And the darling is growing at such an alarming speed, rousing the maternal instinct in me. She’s an absolute gem.

You know your house is in too much a mess when you are talking to your guests, one of your guests(say, Dave) ventured into the kitchen to clear the unwashed dishes in the sink, threw the rubbish, washed the cups, boiled some drinking water, and then scooped the water out into different containers so you can have something decent to drink at home.

You know you are not doing a good vacuuming job when one of your guests(say, Eileen), fought over the vacuum cleaner simply because the way you vacuum is too anal and too girly.

You know you have good friends when they dragged you out in the heavy rain so you could have a proper meal at the nearby coffeeshop despite they have a baby girl with them.

Thanks.

This week has been absolutely stressful, and I forsee an even more tedious week to come(woohoo 2 deadlines next week!), yet these friends have been the ones who are pulling me through.

VampTreSS, thanks for doing all the running around and co-ordination for my shoot, or else I would be running around, flustering like a headless chicken amidst all these mess.

I… am… touched.

I am so emotional I can cry.

I have been too tired, too stressed, too busy to be doing any updating.

My free time is spent largely on catching up on lost sleep, like how I slept for 12 hours yesterday, and yet still feel inadequate when I reach work this morning.

My memory is failing me. I forgot to send this file to my email and I have left it at home instead of having a copy of it on hand here in the office.

Damn! Damn! Damn! Damn!

I am seriously not feeling too good.

Oh, did I mention how my mood swing is going from Changi one day, to Tuas on another?

And work has so many things, though I know they have been trying hard to take the load off me.

I am angry.

Not unlike a potato.

Roarrrrr…………………………………………

I also very broke.

1645, 9th April 2006.

I am running away, people.

Yes, I am serious.

It is going to be a life changing phase for me.

Perhaps, a new job? I don’t know.

Run, I need to run.

Far, far away.