I didn’t leave the office till it was half past 10 last night.

In fact, I am still awake now at half past 8 in the morning, after staying out the entire night after work.

It was sort of like a compensation kinda thing, that I must stay out to chill before I bring all the gloom and stress from work straight home.

Thank God. The hot and heavy session last night out with the brilliant bunch of friends post-work did bring most of my thoughts away from work, though I did hang out with them to do some…. er… ahem, work-related stuff till half past 6 in the morning before we concluded the day with breakfast.

And I was sorta abducted, you see.

***

I should make peanut and century egg porridge as my lunch everyday. Do you know it only costs $1.20 at the hawker center?

Man.

***

Reached office late 2ish, before I started on doing things that I know not of.

Okay, well, not really know not of, but it is more of the frustration of being told that I am allowed freeplay, but everything that was written was then told ‘Hmm.. I am not sure if it would not appear professional enough, and if it would be approved or not…’

Uhm… okay.

So I asked specifically what was to be needed cos I was told different things at different points of time.

And I just wanna know a specific instead of the entire explanation of other nitty-gritties I need not know about.

And, I do not want to be wasting my time to do stupid write-ups when time is so crucial at this point, and knowing that they are not required.

You see, I can understand perfectly fine if I write something and they do not need it, and I can use it for backup on usual circumstances.

But the point is, it is at a time we need to rush everything and wasting time is not an option!

I do not have enough time to write things that are not going to be approved, and have to come up with new stuff.

So, when I asked for the specifics when I was confused by the lengthy explanations, I was told that, ‘You know I never had this problem with any other people on this team that I have to tell them specifically what to do, I cannot be doing this cos you should be having independency, and you have a lot of freeplay than most of us here.‘

Uhm, yeah, right.

I think you hired the wrong person for the job then.

And what was the ‘Er… are you really going to put this, wouldn’t it be too informal? I am not sure if it is a good idea…‘ when I had just went along with the ‘freeplay’?

And who were the buggers who wanted character?!

Oh well.

And what is the most irritating?

When you are not agitated and when you try to be stern(which I automatically set into when I mean business), people will assume you to be fierce and agitated just because they are not used to seeing that side of you.

Then they will tell you straight not to be agitated when you are not.

What is the most irritating is to be assumed to be agitated when you are not, and then they just insisting you are.

Bleah.

Trust me, when I am really agitated, I will be totally quiet till the air is too frosty to bear.

***

I think I am not doing as well as what I expect myself to be.

I think I am not doing as well as what they expected me to be.

Sure, I did manage to finish 85% of what was required to, with the others hanging cos I need information from elsewhere, but I know I could have done better.

Add on the fact that I was extremely PMS-sy, I was biting back tears when the real agitation set in with his choice of words.

I stood up to get a breather.

Before I got to the lift, I started tearing.

I went down to the ground floor, hid behind the pillar, and faced the junction diagonally across Raffles City.

I squatted down, and cracked.

I broke down and sobbed.

Watching the dwindling daylight, buzzing weekend crowd, feeling a sense of helplessness, as if conceding the fact that I am indeed an utter failure.

I took quite a while before I composed myself enough.

That gave me the booster I need. I went up to the vacant office and finished whatever I had to do.

I hate PMS + stress.

I must be the biggest joke/fool on 1st April.

***

If not for the very kind help from Justin and Bernice, it wouldn’t be a possible task for me to finish whatever I had to do.

Thanks. Really.

It is so much easier to communicate with them, cos they get my point and what I am asking for in just a snap of fingers.

***

I am tired. I should be. My eyes are still tired from the intense sob-fest. I was feeling kinda sucky with those heavy eyelids throughout the evening.. and it was almost like a front to put on when I finally met up with the guys.

But much dissipated after the notion of work seems so faraway after meeting up with them.

Yet, I am not sure what is still keeping me going at this strange time of the day when I have yet to sleep.

***

I finally managed to bring the white, sleek baby home after 2 weeks of waiting with the permission from the boss.

I didn’t expect that I would be given an uncool haversack to carry it home.

I was stranded in the middle of nowhere for 40 minutes(oops, he was delayed cos he was stopped by the LTA), sitting on a bench, waiting for the absolutely kind Nick to fetch me to go meet up with the rest.

I desperately needed a dose of dinner, and a dash of chilling.

I looked as if I was a kid on the run, with a big sling bag across, and a big haversack on my back.

We joined Max, Joo Yau, Mindy and Brian at Siglap Gelare.

Alas, I didn’t even have the time to warm the seat nor make an order, before my haversack invited raised brows from the rest.

‘Why are you bringing such a big bag?‘

‘What is inside sial?‘

‘Xbox 360 huh‘ Max joked.

When I pulled out the controller, all 5 of them threw me a sinister look the moment they realised it was indeed the box itself.

Joo Yau was quick to cuddle me and make me his new best friend.

The others, were quick to invite me to their places, and offered me a place to be in for the night.

Before my seat was warmed, they then suggested that we should all adjourned to Mindy’s place, which is nearby, to violate the white pretty thing.

Then, they were swift to help me to carry my bags, passing me my wallet. Nick promptly whipped out a $50 bill(for cab) as they dispersed away from me with my box/games/wireless controller, leaving me in the middle of nowhere in East Coast, a place of such unfamiliarity.

Yes, they had intended to rob me.

But they took pity on me, and abducted me together with the box instead.

Joo Yau gave Max and I a lift over to Mindy’s and had dropped by somewhere for me to pack some dinner. I did have a slight worry that his sedan would be out of sight by the time I emerge from the eatery(my stuff was all in the boot).

Phew. It didn’t happen.

Mindy’s place is cool, though several sightings of my worst nemesis had froze me a couple of times.

Coincidentally, besides the fact that we share the same surname, her dad is taking the same medicine as my dad does cos of their similar heart problems, and her mum is of the same religion as my mum does.

The little darling Button(the pup) of hers kissed me! Aww… so sweet. Though it wasn’t that sweet after seeing how the pup plays with cockroaches and chew on them till they died.

I guess I had pretty limited games with me, and the only great fun was when we were all looking at the boing-boings(that is, bouncing boobies) of the characters in Dead or Alive 4.

And since there was only one controller, we all had to take turns to fight it out with the computer.

Eventually, there was this character that was almost unbeatable, a wrestler-sized ugly bugger who thrashed all of us, badly. We were contemplating on playing the next game, when everyone had wanted to have a go at beating the guy.

We were using this scantily-clad Latin babe to take on him, and she had not an ounce of mercy from him.

Eventually, all of us challenged to see who would be able to take him out without any change in the game characters.

One by one, they joined the exclusive club of winners(we all have great determination), and it was only Max and I who were the losers.

But Max became the ultimate loser when I had beaten the guy before he did. Muahahahaha. Yay.

Cheap thrill, indeed.

We then pit the same ugly fat ass(the wrestler character, not Max) against himself, and Mindy was first to join the winner’s club, whilst the guys had a hard time fighting him off.

Amazingly, I was the next in the club. Hohoho. Guys were the losers!

Of course, with the kind of egoistical male species in the group, it is hardly surprising that they wanted to fight it out till the end to show that they too, can beat the guy.

Max and Joo Yau then left, and it was only Nick, Mindy, Brian, Mindy’s brother, and me.

With a single controller, it was hardly satisfying.

Brian and I went up to Mindy’s room(gee, her room is cosy!) to bring down the set of Gen 1 Xbox, and started playing this racing game that was actually really fun.

The aim was to crash into as many cars as possible, and doing maximum damage to clock up the most expensive sum.

Though I have to admit that I suck at such silly games.

Maybe because I am not that destructive nor clumsy in real life. COUGH!

***

Told ya I was doing work-related stuff. Playing the 360 and Xbox is part of my work, you know?

All the fightings and destructivities are enough to vent those pent up stress in me.

***

I am indeed an emotional gamer.

And Mindy snapped few crucial evidences to illustrate that I am indeed one.

I look as if I was humping something when I bounced up and down on the couch, making weird noises as I battled it out on DOA 4.

I think I did kick Max and her brother in the heat of all actions.

Uhm…..

And now, I have to make sure those video clips don’t leak out… somewhere.. somehow… somewhat.

***

But I have more things to worry about.

Joo Yau was trying his moves he learnt from his martial arts lessons on me, kicking me and my butt, literally.

Brian tried it on me too, and when I tried to retaliate, he grabbed my feet and tickled them, and then pulled me onto the floor by pulling the legs of my jeans.

My jeans nearly slipped off, I might add.

These guys should be banned from the streets after attending all those lessons.

Like that 2 seconds clip of me peeing in the loo when Max snuck up and held the camera over the top of the entrance.

He had wanted to snap a picture when I was in the toilet but he had accidentally took a clip instead.

Luckily the angle was off…. BUT STILL………..

They caught my naked butt on the toiletbowl on the clip….!!!!!

Asswipes!!!

Baskets!!!!!

I cringed when they started passing the blink-and-you-miss-it clip around.

@#^@%#&@%#!@*#@%^@%@^$@&%$@*^#

Return me my innocence, you asswipes!!

Woe is me. What kind of friends do I have?!

***

It was half past 6 when we finally left her place.

The 4 of us, without her brother, made our way to East Coast McDee’s for some breakkie.

The guys decided to swap ‘lovers’; Brian pillioned Mindy on Nick’s scrambler, whilst Nick fetched me on Brian’s bike.

That bugger’s bike died on us when it ran out of fuel, and we had to stop to run it on reserve.

We sat around McDee’s trading stories of the ‘past’ and hmm, what can I say, indeed insightful (evil sneers).

It was a quarter to eight, before it was the journey from east to west in the bright, morning sun.

The east is indeed mesmerising in the day… I wish I do stay in the east side as well.

I am cool.

Once this hormonal stage is over, it is back to work with full zest.

Just lemme have some peaceful rest before they start calling me and disrupt my sleep to work(yes… I might have to work today too…. hurhurhur).

AHHH BISHHHHHHHHH

AHH DAHHHHHH

HOYYYYYYYYY DAHHHHHHH

HEEEEEEHHAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH