I finally get to see some of the pictures taken by VampTreSS and Chrissy. They are fabulous.

Though I am looking forward to more space and more time and more room for creavity the next time round. Less fats, please.

I haven’t been sleeping well for the past couple of days, as usual.

I only got to sleep past 7am this morning(screwed body clock, oh dear!), and there was a nagging pain in my tummy due to indigestion before I felt comfortable enough to drift into deep slumber.

I dreamt.

I dreamt of people in my life. I dreamt of my mother.

I remember waking up feeling totally tensed and upset by the dream, before I went back into the same dream with a heavy heart.

I woke up with the same sinking feeling within. It sucks, really.

It wasn’t anything that reflected the reality, but I felt the same exhaustion I suffered in the dream as I woke up.

Sucky.

***

I didn’t go anywhere on a Saturday like this, though I had very much wanted to succumb to the temptation of Orchard in the evening.

I did want to go back to Malaysia, but there wasn’t any transport.

I didn’t go out, except to get myself some food, and I have a new love, Meiji yogurt with Longan. Yummy.

MotoGP kept me home, and a series of television programs kept me glued to the dummy box.

From Hell was good with Johnny Depp, and it does help that I always have a morbid fascination with Jack the Ripper.

Just seen Germany sailing through to the next round, and I guess I would be up to witness Argentina spanking Mexico’s butt.

I have to say I am growing increasingly unhappy with the part timer’s work with the chores.

I woke up to find(I guess she had just left not long before I woke up) the glass tables(dining table and tea table) wet from water(as if wiped with a cloth too wet and not squeeze dry), and the leathery part of the sofa was cleaned in the same way as well.

The bathroom, as usual, was soaked in water, with the excess not swept into the drainage.

I fall down how?!

And not to mention last Saturday she tripped the vacuum cleaner, and then caused the entire’s house electricity supply to the circuits(the lights were okay) be cut off(I was using my computer!).

And she just stopped using the vacuum cleaner, mopped the floor, and then left the washing machine stood still, filled with water.

She didn’t know the circuits were dead.

Ah well.

Anyway, as the water on the glass tables dried up(hello?! I have glass cleaners at home, you know?), the ugly water marks were evident, and the tables look dirtier than before.

Of course, with the vacuum cleaner still down, though I know she mopped the floor, I wonder why she didn’t bother 1) use the broom to sweep and, 2) use the broom-like dust-wipes.

And as much as she cleared my cluttered sink, it doesn’t make things look any neater when she just chunked the tubes of toothpaste, facial foam, SBB’s hairgel, the moisturiser AND my toothbrush(facing down! The audacity!) all into the tray by the side, not bothered to arrange them to stand neatly.

Breathe…….

***

I didn’t feel like going anywhere on Friday after staying out late on Thursday night.

Had a quiet dinner with Dad was pretty nice.

A table of family was right behind us, with 2 very active boys running around, making lotsa noises.

I asked Dad what kind of kid I was, and he said I was always quiet(muahahaha!), well-behaved, except when I was asked to recite things I learnt, or asked to sing.

He then commented how I was always very attached to him.

He shared how when I was 2 or 3, we were residing in Johor, and he would always have to leave the house at 5am to go to work.

And everytime, when I heard the stirs, I would wake up and scurried out of the bed, and refused to let him go.

I was a kid who was always afraid, he said.

I laughed, and thought to myself how I am still afraid, as an adult.

***

On our way back, Dad asked if I remember that one year when Mum went back to Malaysia for Chinese New Year without us.

I laughed.

Yes I do.

That year, was the only year when we didn’t have reunion dinner.

Dad and I heated some leftover food, and settled our dinner, just like that.

Alas, we burnt the food, and it was all charred. Dad sneakily threw the pot away, to avoid Mum’s naggings.

He had to bring me out to buy food, and we later dropped by one of those funfair carnivals.

It was the first time I had so much fun, and I just chunked Dad aside, as I indulged in all those games, rides and my favourite - the bumper cars.

The night was endless. Mum would never ever allow me to take those rides.

I was just a clumsy kid in a bumper car, having the time of my life as my Dad had beer(and occasionally letting me to have a sip) nearby.

I kept saying I wanted to play somemore, and I didn’t go home till very late that night.

I love bumper-cars.

***

SBB’s call woke me up on Thursday.

We met up for a drink in town, as I had to drop by my previous office to collect some payment, before going for a business gathering at Singapore Recreational Club.

It has been a long while since I pulled on a tight, executive skirt, wearing long sleeved shirt to head out.

So uncomfortable….

I still couldn’t find my contact lenses. Bleah.

We sat by BakerZin, catching up a little, before I returned to the office to find Bernice there as well.

It was quite a while before I had to leave for SRC, and we roamed the malls a little using that grace.

I… am… so… tempted…. to….. buy…. something…

I squeezed his hand a little tighter as the urge built up, and the inner war of to-buy-or-not-to-buy was just too great.

I am so relieved I wasn’t in Orchard.

I nearly ventured into Nine West and Coach… and refused to settle for anything less.

I must be really crazy.

***

The silly boy walked me to the junction before I had to cross the road to SRC.

He pointed the white building in a distance to me, that was across the field.

I sulked and contemplated on taking a cab over.

At the zebra crossing, it was a smooch on the lip, a hug, and I tasted his tongue once more before he merged into the evening human traffic… disappearing into the crowd.

And I realised, the silly boy gave me wrong direction. SRC was right before me, and not the white building in a distance. Thank God.

***

It was a social evening.

Making small talks, feeling out of place once in a while, and letting my thoughts drifting into the night as we sat out in the open, on the roof terrace.

Night was pretty. Buildings are charming. The Swissotel was just right before me as the traffic zoomed past.

I was too lazy to move, until the guys adjourned to New Asia Bar, where there was football action to keep me occupied.

I mingled with the people there, and it got a little tiring.

I was asked a very interesting question, ‘You stay out so late, your husband not worried?’.

Uhm……..

***

I went home at 1-ish in the drizzle.

I boarded a Comfort cab, 5079, and asked to proceed to Jurong East.

I am quite sure he asked again, and I said Jurong East Avenue 1.

I was very tired, and said any route will do.

I was all drained from the social mingling and leaned my head against the window to rest.

He overshot the expressway exit, and the next exit would be much further away from my home.

I wasn’t sleeping and I sat up to tell him that he missed the exit.

Then he said, he thought I was heading to Jurong West Street 71.

I told him not to worry and it was okay.

He exited at this industrial area, where it was deserted and quiet, and drove straight into this road without knowing where he was heading.

Not a single soul, and he hit a dead end.

He had to U-turn out, and there wasn’t any way for him to get back onto the expressway.

I directed him to West Coast(a big round), and then turned into Teban, before getting back on the route.

He then kept apologising and said I could just pay him the usual fare. I sounded pretty calm, and agreed.

When the cab finally reached, it was 18.45 on the meter, and I only had 20 bucks with me(I would have passed him 15 if I had change).

The usual fare would be something between 14-15.

And then he said ‘generously’, ‘Oh, 18 will do.’

What the….

I was too tired to fight for my rights, and was pissed internally but just didn’t feel like saying another word.

And I grew angrier with myself when I fail to stand up for myself over such minor incidents.

I just wanted to have a nice shower and rest on my bed after a tiring day.

Ah well.

Stupid, silly me.

I loathe being short-changed.