I could see the sadness in their eyes when I brought baby away.

Dad told me how it made him think through day and night, cos he is afraid baby will grow up with the past haunting her, just like how mine had.

He wants a better environment for her.

With great sadness, he cupped her cheeks in his hands, and kissed her goodbye. I know it was painful for him, and that image, almost made me cry.

It eventually did.

I cried thinking of my parents feeling a little empty, a little loss, without her.

All in all, I am a little lost too.

***

I am still feeling a little floaty and airy today. Spent the night waking up intermittently to see if I had squashed her or if she was cold. But most of the time, it was her flying kick to my face that made me grab her feet and hold it close to me as I went back to sleep.

Her hand felt a little cold, yet she kicked away the blanket, so I just inched up closer to her, and held her tiny hand.

I watched her sleep in the car yesterday and she is such a girly-girl now.

She learns very fast.

So fast.